Sewing My Life Together

Not Really Feelin’ It Today….

Today I went with friends to the Concord Museum to see the Annie Liebowitz landscapes and other photographs (not portraits). It was a beautiful exhibit, after which we had a fun lunch. When I came home, I knew I had a few hours of hand sewing to do and I was not looking forward to it. Uncharacteristically, I was kind of dragging…

And I think I know why….it’s a  post-museum, post-art show, post-quilt show mini-depression. I love seeing what the experts can do, and how beautiful their work is.  I truly admire and enjoy their work. In contrast, however, my own efforts appear pale by comparison. My work is not gorgeous, perfect, or often even remotely artistic. It just is. While I might aspire to create an art quilt, the fact is that I am not an artist, but a crafter…and after seeing a gorgeous show like the one at the Concord Museum, I feel a little bit like a fraud.

Or, if not a fraud, a….I don’t really know what. A wanna-be? A pretender? I am not sure what word I am searching for.

But I did spend a couple of slow hours working on this quilt, feeling drained by the whole experience.  Coupled with the fact that I work slowly and it takes me hours to complete anything,  it was a bummer of an evening.

So, on this project, I have more hours of hand-quilting to complete, then binding, then washing and ironing….and it make take me a few days to recharge myself. It’s on a day like this that I think of quitting…but then I remind myself that this is all a process, and all processes have their ups and downs. and I also remind myself…am I doing this to create perfection? No, I am not. I am doing this for the process of it, for the elemental feeling of it, for the experience of using my hands and sewing machine to create something new…

This entry was published on July 21, 2012 at 11:31 am and is filed under Crafts, Interests, Quilting, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

6 thoughts on “Not Really Feelin’ It Today….

  1. shirley on said:

    To create something new, yes, something that simply would not have existed if you hadn’t made it. But, also, you are spreading love and care…and creating something completely unique and its own thing…to be perceived and experienced (and undoubtedly enjoyed) by others completely separate from you. It is special. And I think the quilt is coming out beautifully!

    • Faye Gurry on said:

      Hi Susan, I know exactly how you feel, when you see the experts and then look at your own work, you are very hard on yourself, but the thing is the love that goes into every stitch. It may not be exactly perfect, but you have enjoyerd creating something so special, that no-one else has done is amazing, keep it up girl.

      Faye NZ

      • Dear Faye,

        What a nice reply…..I think I forgot that you are also a seamstress/quilter? And how wonderful that this comment comes from another Gurry! You thoughts really helped me think about this differently. Keep reading!

    • Thanks, Shirley…again, this is a thought I had not considered. And this project is a gift for a colleague who is having a baby in late September and I am happy to give this to her as a gift. Thanks for the comment!

  2. Hi Susan,
    Sorry to hear that your sewing made you sad today but I do empathize with the very humbling experience of going to an exhibition.

    I thought I would share two thoughts with you in the hope of you having a better day tomorrow. One is that if you or someone else will love what you make it does not matter how ‘expert’ it is. Second one is that it takes 10 000 hours to become expert at something (yes there is research you can google on this) so you are on the journey to getting there and the fact that others are already there means that you can do it too.

    So, stick at it and enjoy it, and have your online friends help you get there too 🙂

    Looking forward to seeing some more of your project on your next post.

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